You Down with OCD? Yeah, You Know Me

May 31st, 2016

carolina k.

{Dress c/o Carolina K. (available at Faena Hotel Miami Beach Tierra Santa Spa Boutique), Valentino sandals, Balenciaga handbag, Mercedes Salazar earrings, Céline sunnies}

mercedes salazar earrings

maria tettamanti

Do any of you heathens get psychotically psychotic with a certain outfit? I know I certainly do. I get OCD with clothing/accessories much like germaphobes obsessively wash their hands from cooties (that’s a horrible metaphor but I suppose you get the point). Take for example this Carlolina K. dress and Mercedes Salazar earrings. In the last week alone, I’ve worn them three times to separate events — someone call the Fashion Police! Donning the same ensemble within a five-day period is basically committing blogger suicide. Whatevs. You know you totally spritz on the Febreeze and do the same thang. Don’t lie to yourself! 

So now said dress is at the dry cleaners (because there’s only so much our dear friend Febreeze can do) and I have anxiety about it. I TOLD YOU I WAS MENTAL. I mean, who gets separation anxiety with an item of clothing?


Anyhoo, I just got back from three nights in Bimini, Bahamas and it was pure magic! The husband, kids and I cruised over on our boat (from Miami, it’s a 2-hour ordeal). We spent the days at a beach called Honeymoon Harbour where we spotted hundreds of manta rays, two nurse sharks (eek!) and conch shells aplenty. Now it’s back to work and the vacation depression is setting in. Thankfully, I have some Game of Thrones catching up to do so that should lift my sunken spirits.

Photos by Karla Garcia

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Fast Cars & Fierce Shoes

May 25th, 2016

Fast cars and fierce shoes go together like email spam and my mama opening it! So for my Audi Q7 collab with THE COLLECTION and World Red Eye, I mixed the sporty SUV with sexy fringe heels. You can read the entire interview here and peep some of the pics below which were snapped at Bal Harbour Shops and the sizzling streets of the 305.

maria tettamanti

{Timo Weiland dress, Aquazzura heels, Hermès Birkin, Céline sunnies}

hermes birkin

Audi q7

auquazzura wild thing

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Workin’ My Flab Into FAB

May 22nd, 2016

maria tettamanti

{BB Dakota top, American Eagle shorts, Metallic sneakers c/o Cole Haan, Earrings and necklace c/o Taudrey,  Chanel boy bag with Fendi “Karl” pom pom, Céline sunnies}

fendi pom pom

karl lagerfeld pom pom

leg workout

miami fashion blog

We need to talk about working out because I’ve become one of those annoying people that utters stupid things to their friends like, “Sugar and gluten are the devil” or “Squat it likes it’s hot” or “Won’t quit till I’m fit” and “Work out like Channing Tatum is watching.” Talk about irritating! At least I haven’t taken up Cross Fit or a vegan lifestyle SO THERE.

Besides, everyone needs a vice and working out is a healthier obsession over a grody meth addiction any day of the week.

Anyhoo, with summer, around the corner (AKA Bahama Mama Bikini Season), I’ve been bumping up my workout game with a personal trainer. I found him through two close friends as we needed someone to come to our home because my husband doesn’t “do” the gym (Read: He’s a brat).

The 411 on our new certified personal trainer? His name is Deano Statler and he personally comes to our home here in South Florida 3 mornings a week for a half hour where he whips the husband and I into shape in the form of squats, lunges, burpees and other mean things. I actually love the fact my husband joins me because it feels like couples therapy because all we do is whine, bitch, moan, complain and sweat. Emphasis on the “complain” part. But I feel like the throwback booty music makes up for all of it. 

My focus? To lean out my body (that’s 99% the food I eat) and get some sexy muscle definition. My legs are getting where I want them to be as indicative in these pictures (whoop whoop!). And if I score a plump, non-store-bought Kardashian butt in all my efforts with Deano, that would be just fab, too.

So if you’re into masochism, a tighter ass, and that sorta thing, his digits are (772) 360-8064.

Photos by Karla Garcia

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Ask! Ask! Ask!

May 19th, 2016

Nikki Novo & Maria Tettamanti

Cyber children, listen up! I’ve been itching to get to know you all a little bit better so I’m giving Facebook Live a stab. So I wanted to invite you to jump on a Facebook Live session I’m doing with my dear friend and personal development blogger Nikki Novo next week.

The crux? Just ask us questions! Ask us about branding! Ask us about social media! Ask us if we smoke weed (kidding!). Ask us ANYTHING! 

It’s happening next Tuesday, May 24 at 1 p.m. EST/10 a.m PST. We’ll be live on my blog’s page here:

See you there!

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Cheeks On Fleek

May 15th, 2016

celine sunglasses

{Cheek fillers by Dr. Julio Gallo of The Miami Institute}

hermes birkin

{Bardot dress, Valentino rockstuds, Hermès Birkin handbag, Céline sunnies, Van Cleef & Arpels earrings}

valentino rockstuds

hermes birkin


You know I keep it real here. Over the past year, I lost 13 pounds and kept them off because I’ve drastically changed my eating habits (no more carbs and sugar!) and bumped up my workout game to rival that of an Olympian.

But…the weight loss has been no bueno to my face because it thinned out too much and I was starting to look like the creepy thingamajig in Edvard Munch’s “The Scream” painting. Thankfully, The Miami Institute took notice of my blog and offered me a consultation with Doctor Julio Gallo where we decided this girl needed some Juvéderm dermal fillers in my cheeks ASAP.

During my chat with Dr. Gallo, I learned that as we get older, our skin’s collagen production goes South (much like the direction of our boobs), which in turn, causes less firmness and suppleness. This equates to, yep, you guessed it… dreaded wrinkles and deep folds. And we all can agree that the only living creatures in which droopy/wrinkly skin looks cute on are basset hounds and Shar Peis. #Trust

So Juvéderm to the rescue! And I knew I was in good hands. You see, Doctor Gallo is Miami’s top plastic surgeon and take a look at my results above! I’m obsessed. He injected the apples of my cheeks with Juvéderm Voluma which added volume beneath my skin’s surface to lift and contour my cheek area. And, nope, it didn’t hurt because a nurse rubbed cream on the treated area 40 minutes beforehand so the face is nice and numb (cue The Weeknd’s “I Can’t Feel My Face” tune right about now). 

For those of you unfamiliar with The Miami Institute, their office is nestled inside the swanky Four Seasons Hotel in Downtown Miami and is super Chic (capital “C” for dramatic effect, natch). Swathed in contemporary art, the office boasts the best-of-the-best doctors and every get-pretty procedure under the sun. Celebrities (sorry…my lips are sealed!) flock to this office like moths to a flame and with good reason…the results here are perfection. To find out more, visit here or call (305) 692-0695. 

Doctor Gallo

 {Dr. Julio Gallo and I during my appointment}

Photos by Karla Garcia

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